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Saturday, August 18, 2007

Dreams

Last night I had a few interesting dreams.

I've often dreamed about highschool (VWO, 6 years). I've had a wonderful time at school, except for the last year. My fear of failure got worse with all the exams and my black-outs started after a concussion I got in the swimming pool. The dreams are always about this last year: I have an exam and don't remember anything about the subject; it is the first day of that last year and I don't have books or I am too late, etc. You get the picture. Tonight I dreamed I was late for the first day again. I didn't have books, couldn't find my school supplies, didn't know my schedule, etc. I felt very anxious to put it mildly. Suddenly I calmed down and started thinking: 'what is this? why am I doing this? feeling this? I already have my VWO diploma! I've had this before and it is nonsens. Stop it!' And then my dream ended...
I hope this is my last dream about this subject. If it isn't, I hope I can redo what I did in the dream last night!

I often dream about my parents: sometimes in the present with a message, sometimes about the present and they are still alive, but mostly about times when they were still alive. Last night I dreamed I was in my parental home, the one where I've lived for years. I was downstairs, not sure what I was doing, I was the age I am now. I was waiting for mum and dad to come down or come home, something like that. Suddenly I got thinking: 'is this real? it feels strange!' and then I realized: 'they won't show up! is mum dead? or dad? or... both? oh no, they are both dead!' The world around me faded away and I felt sooo sad... Then I woke up crying.
I love dreams about my parents, but not this one! I don't know what to think of it.

2 comments:

  1. Anonymous19/8/07 22:17

    Do you know the concept of a lucid dream? Well, dear if You didn't, I can tell you that you just had one. A lucid dream is, so to speak a dream within a dream. They contain most of the time important messages about your inner self, the future, your fears and dreams. Take this dream at school. You find out that the first dream is rubish, and you are capable to switch it of.... Hmmm...I think you're beginning to tackle the problem of perfectionism.....
    wonder

    ReplyDelete
  2. I was just about to say you were having a lucid dream, until I saw the comment you got. I do that all the time. But I came back to comment on this one because I, still at age 63, dream about not graduating high school. Often I wake up and realize, yes I did, and for years I pulled out my diploma to make sure it was real.

    ReplyDelete

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